Hello friend! If this is your first time visiting my blog, ✨welcome✨. If you’ve come back after reading my first post, ✨welcome back✨. Regardless, I’m so happy you’re here!

Maybe you’re here looking for comfort, knowing there’s someone who understands the fertility struggle. Maybe you’re here because you know someone who’s going through the journey, and you aren’t sure how to approach them. Well, you’ve come to the right place.

If my Instagram brought you here, and you just want to show your support, thank you!

No matter who you are, I welcome you to get to know me and join me on this journey we call life.

This is how our baby journey began!

Taking The First Step

It goes without saying that everyone’s journey to parenthood is different. No two stories are exactly the same, similar as they may seem. Our journey didn’t begin with us deciding to give it our all. Jason and I started trying without trying and the mentality of “if it happens, it happens”.

We did this for almost two years with no pregnancy in sight. Finally, we decided we were ready (like ready, ready) around October 2020. I talked to my OBGYN about actively trying to start our family. 

That’s when I got “the news”. (Yeah, you know the one. 😪)

My body wasn’t naturally producing the estrogen needed to ovulate properly and get pregnant.

This made sense. Growing up, my periods were always irregular. And I’ve always been so tiny! (4’11 and no more than 85 lbs until I was in my late 20’s.)

Apparently, body types and menstrual cycles have a lot to do with each other.

This news meant that it would take some extra effort to get pregnant. Simply doing the deed just wasn’t going to cut it. 

(So much for all that birth control I took in my teens and early twenties. 🙄)

To help with this, my doctor prescribed Clomid for me to take – which basically kick-starts ovulation. Then, I would have to pee on ovulation sticks every day around mid-cycle – the time I should be ovulating. When I got a positive ovulation test, well, you know…
👉👌

The Highest of Highs

When I started taking my meds, Jason and I kept reminding each other… 

*Ahem* let me rephrase. HE kept reminding ME that it could be months before this actually worked. I started Clomid right after my period following the doctor’s appointment, as directed. I used the ovulation sticks, and it was time! 😏

I was trying so hard not to get my hopes up. But let’s be real, that’s hard to do! The TWW (two-week wait) was torture. It always is, so I tried not to think about it. But that’s kinda hard when this is such a huge part of your life. 

I distracted myself with work. I tried not to talk about it. I pushed it out of my mind as much as possible.

I was a little late on my period, but I thought nothing of it. I was used to being 2 months late on my period. And I wasn’t sure how long it would be until my meds kicked in. 

Then one day, I told my manager (who was one of the very few who knew we were trying) that I was a few days late and my boobs were sore. 

“You should take a pregnancy test!” was her immediate reaction. 

I was like, “Noooooo, could it be?? Nahhhhh.”

But there’s no going back on a comment like that!

So I went home for lunch that day like I always did. It was the daily routine: let the fur babies out to potty, eat something out of the freezer or leftovers Jason “forgot” to take to work, oh and that day, take a pregnancy test. No big deal!

Luckily, the ovulation kits I bought included a pregnancy test. I grabbed the test, stared at it for a moment trying to bury my hope, and said, “Fuck it!” 

I peed on the stick, set it down next to the sink and walked away. Well, I took two steps out of the bathroom and turned my ass around. Do you know how hard it is not to stare at that damn stick and yet not want to look at it, but of course you want to look at it, or maybe I should have someone else tell me the results?? It’s a whole ass struggle!

I took it into the kitchen (with the cap on, of course!) and set it down while I threw some frozen burritos into the microwave. 

While I waited for my burrito to get too hot and eventually burn the skin off the roof of my mouth because I couldn’t wait for it to cool down… I couldn’t stop myself from looking.

I WAS PREGNANT!

Bet you wanna know what happens next! Well, come back next week to find out… 😉

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